Sunday, March 30, 2008

One for the road

So they intend reducing the permitted blood alcohol level further for drivers.
I remember when the evidence for road accident frequency and alcohol was first used to justify a law change.
The published graphs showed an exponential increase in accident frequency compared with individual alcohol consumption. But on the far left of this chart, before the accidents and the alcohol started mounting up there was a tiny dip, like a tick, a little valley before the graph took off into a large hill, practically unnoticeable.
The only interpretation is that 1 drink makes you a safer driver. I can’t find that graph now maybe it has been forgotten about. More likely it is unthinkable in this ‘free’ society of ours.

Tuesday, March 25, 2008

Put it in the Curry

I can say Deoxyribonucleic without a conscious thought but Cardamom I cannot say without my face screwing up in concentration and spelling it first in my head and then reading the image phonetically. Why should this be?

Saturday, March 15, 2008

Press

Me to the Brecon & Radnor

Please advise - have you got a new editor yet ?

Who is it?

I hope its not that awful fellow who took my letter - changed the heading, inserted a photograph and a cartoon and manufactured a letter which was about logic into an anti Welsh piece for his own purposes. Citizen Kane he was not.

I need to know to see whether it is safe to send anything in.


Brecon & Radnor to me

Pleased to advise that Julie Chappell is the new editor, not the poor man’s Citizen Kane, and it is presumably safe for you to resume contributing to our letters page.
However I must add I didn’t change the text of your previous letter.
Yours
Twm Owen
News editor

Tel: 01874 610111
Fax: 01874 624097
------------------------
The Brecon and Radnor Express Ltd is a limited company registered in England
and Wales. Registered number: 2677142. Registered Office: The Old Court House, Union Road, Farnham GU9 7PT.

Me to Brecon & Radnor

No just as Bill Clinton did not have sex with that woman you did not change the text of my letter. Other than the heading, the Polish cartoon, the photograph and the deliberate misdirection of emphasis, other than that you were a model of journalistic integrity.


He hasn’t replied.

Sunday, March 09, 2008

Guilty M’lud

But with extenuating circumstances – I only wanted to play chess not to have to listen to another awful american going on about how good he was.

Dear stanfordlehope ,

Your Electronic Arts Pogo account has been issued a warning for
violating the Terms of Service for Electronic Arts Online.

Violation: Use of inappropriate language
Transmit or facilitate distribution of Content that is harmful,
abusive, racially or ethnically offensive, vulgar, sexually explicit,
defamatory, infringing, invasive of personal privacy or publicity rights, or in
a reasonable person's view, objectionable. Hate speech is not
tolerated.

Chat Log:
StanfordleHope 21:09:35 do fuck off

Sunday, March 02, 2008

Mothering Sunday incident at the Rhosgoch Golf Club

Top Bog

Going to Rhosgoch Golf Club today for lunch. As you can see they have a really ‘quacking ‘ bog there and I am looking forward to it. I think they mean quaking but perhaps they are just proud of it.

Saturday, March 01, 2008

At least you could eat the Eloi




I have just signed up to Bebo just to read what the local youth are up to.
God they are morons and it is worse than I imagined.
I was prepared to grant for the sake of argument that writing in text –speak might have some merit that I could not yet appreciate; but it has none its an illusion adding nothing to ideas and dropping much. If you are going to write in an abbreviated way then why write ‘is’ as ‘iz’ ? What is saved? What is the different shade of meaning?
They have nothing to say it is almost all about their gr8 m8s etc. At least when the human race degenerated in the ‘Time Machine’ they provided a bit of fodder for the Morlocks.