Monday, June 12, 2006

The Ontology of the Sausage and other trivia




Captain Oates would never have turned up again a few days later stuck his head in the tent and announced 'I've just come back for a bit.'
Anyway I have returned but it may not be for long.
Here is a picture of a 'cheese and wine party' attended during the week.
Thats Lord Bingham talking to our vicar.
A few years ago I remember the vicar, worried about possible lack of attendance at the Church fĂȘte, saying. " Ive managed to persuade Lord Bingham to open it so at least the IRA should turn up".
On the subject of food I inadvertently left my sausages in Brittany last week.
Our host has arranged for somebody staying on for a further week to bring them back. I wanted to take a picture of myself with knife and fork at the ready and insert a caption along the lines of 'and even as he sat his sausage had set sail for the shores of Wales'. I wasn't sure about the expression 'set sail' and also 'even as' and so used the Yahoo question site to ask someone. A lady called Vaness said she was French and gave me the translation. However she pointed out that I should use the plural of the word sausage, as there is a possibility it might be confused with a penis. I was brought up on 'Carry on ' films and so I find such pathetic jokes hysterical and it is of course what I intended. I don’t know whether she meant this as a genuine correction or if she was merely expressing her contempt that I should think it was funny. By the way in this part of Wales the plural of sausage is indeed sausage. They don’t ask for a pound of sausages but a pound of sausage.
Although each sausage is unquestionably a separate entity the apparently illogical unity imposed upon these spatially separate entities illustrates a different way of thinking about it/them. He who says sausage and not sausages thinks of the world differently just as he who ends his sentence with a verb has a subtley different world view. Thats why I wish I could speed up learning French as I am getting a bit bored with the present perspective.

4 comments:

FBT said...

what's the yahoo question site and how does it work? I was just reading in the Economist about an Amazon-run thing called Mechanical Turk which seems to be similar only there you have to pay (cents, not dollars) to have your questions answered

MacDuff said...

(Sorry fbt - I should have posted but emailed instead - so I will repeat)
This is the address Yahoo Answers .
I think it is some kind of game where you get points for answering other peoples questions. It served my
purpose though.
Wasnt the Mechanical Turk some kind of chess playing robot that turned out to contain a midget?

Caerphilly said...

An apocryphal story no doubt.

De Gaulle and Mme. dG were in Britain and were asked what they valued most. Mme. de Gaulle instantly replied 'a penis'. There was a frosty silence before the general coughed and said, ' my dear the word is pronounced 'appiness'. Boom boom.

MacDuff said...

Worthy of Sid James himself that!